Forward Academy Testimonial: Getting to the Heart of the Matter

Almost a full year to the launch of the Forward Academy here is a reflection from our launch member

By: Angelica Vazquez

Mental gymnastics is a concept I have discussed often with other women and POC. We use this phrase to describe the mental resources that are exhausted when we find ourselves trying to co-exist in spaces that were not designed for us nor welcoming of our experiences.

I have spent too many days trying to figure out if an encounter I had in the workplace was racist/sexist/classist. When allies are not clearly visible this is an isolating experience. It breeds self-doubt. Was I right in what I was feeling? Was I overreacting? Am I imagining the hostile interactions I’ve been experiencing? If I were a white man, would the situation have ended differently?

Every step I took I overanalyzed. The fear of being seen as inarticulate, unintelligent, or over-passionate was ever present and crushing.  I avoided situations where I felt I would be exposed to microaggressions and by doing so limited my own growth. Everyday I came home feeling as if I had lived through a battle. After years of this, I was tired and the weight of my experiences weren’t just resting on my mind or soul, it was tangible. I could feel it in the incessant ache in my neck and shoulders. I needed a solution.

When Imani, L.K.A Coach Faith, presented the option of joining the Faith Forward Academy I readily signed up. A network dedicated to the professional experiences of women of color was welcomed. In the seven months since I’ve joined, I can say that it turned out to be exactly what I needed. Having dedicated space for reflection and validation of my experiences helped ease the burden I had been carrying. She has many gifts, but one of the most profound is her gift of vision. Not only can she see ten miles down the road, she can see paths not yet discovered. More importantly, she helped me see them too.

In our time together she worked on helping me find new perspectives and lean into my strengths. I spent so much time focusing on what I thought was “wrong” I missed all of the great work I was a part of and all of the strengths I brought to the table. The conversations around existing in white male dominant spaces, the affirmations, the centering, the sisterhood, the knowledge that I may be one person but I am not alone- all lit a fire of fearlessness in me. I walk in every space without fear or the need to ask permission to exist. I am guided by my sisterhood and a strengthened connection to my spiritual self.

Coach Faith is a proponent of words of affirmation. I will end with the words I was able to find and that live in my soul, propelling me forward, “I am indomitable.”

Update: Today marks 1 week since Angie has transitioned into a new role, in a new industry that reflects her values, gifts and talents. The fact that she has increased her total compensation by 40% is a well-deserved bonus 🎉. In her first week of onboarding she reports “my brain hurts but my heart is happy!”

Practice for Purpose

I listen to music every day. Whether it’s bumping through my headphones, flowing in my spirit or amplified by the birds chirping; music is solace and inspiration for me. A conversation with one of my best friends this morning sparked this blog post. Thank you “tister”. 

Earlier this week I was hearing “Practice” by Drake playing in my spirit; no headphones, no radio on, and let me add that I’m not a huge Drake fan (no shade, just truth). I paused and asked, “God, why am I hearing this song? Drake though? That’s ‘random’” Let me tell you, everything happens for a reason. As my best friend and I engaged in a rather revolutionary correspondence on racial equity, capitalism, philanthropy and the transformation needed individually and collectively to shift that “power” (all of that and then some), she said:

“My manager tries---but there’s not enough freedom despite the work I do-- I have to fit into a mold here” “Practice space”. That was it! I went to grab my headphones and get this amplified in my spirit to convey guidance to these two questions: How can you use your current job as practice for your purpose? How can you use this practice for a purpose-filled exit strategy?

Drake and God Imani? Yes! God knows my heart and it is written “let those who have an ear hear” so before we decode the lyrics allow me to lay this foundation. I have been in the Book of Jeremiah for a few weeks now. Yesterday I read Jeremiah 18 “The Potter and the Clay”. Let me remind you that my friend said “I have to fit into a mold here”. In Jeremiah 18 God spoke to Jeremiah and instructed him to go to the potter’s house. Jeremiah observed the potter make vessels of clay “and it seemed good to make.” (Jeremiah 18:4) “Look, as the clay is in the potter’s hand, so are you in My hand, o house of Israel!” (Jeremiah 18:6). What’s the connection?

1. Some of you are in places by your own doing for unrighteous reasons. Well, that struck some nerves. Be honest with yourself. 

2. You may still be in that place (not simply role or location but also state of being) because there’s more work that you need to do before you move forward.

3. Consider that you are being molded and this is practice.

After all, you have already been deemed “good to make” for greater.

Since you’re (we’re) still in training, let’s practice with purpose in mind. I need you to retrain your ears and perspective to hear the song as though your purpose is speaking to you:

• “Cash money..” - So Drake starts off from the gate speaking about the dinero. Yes, I know it’s Cash Money Records but again *points upward* retrain your ears. While you’re at said job, How can you be more financially literate and sound? How can you make the resources there work for you? Look into personal saving and financial management resources. Consider investing in your own professional development (at the job or beyond), personal growth and your exit.

• “I can tell that money’s got you workin’” - Money is the root of all evil. That evil comes in the form greed, unethical business decisions and keeping society with the have and the have nots. Now while you have access to that financial capital and might I extend social capital, how can you repurpose that for the greater good of someone or something greater than you? How can you leverage that paycheck? One can imagine that the money may have you looking new, old, or….. straight up tired. Some of your jobs are working you for every. single. cent and draining you might I add.  Drake does go on to say there’s “pain and regret” in that sweat equity. Don’t let it make you.

• “I can tell that you’ve been practicin’...all those other (roles, jobs, managers, coworkers) were practice... yeah for me” - Your practice makes perfect approach is paying off here. Isn’t this the exciting part? I am excited looking at it myself. What skill(s) (technical, leadership, “soft” etc) would you like to strengthen? What do you need to do and where can you go to make that happen? Situate the pursuit in what you feel called to do.

• “You only want what’s real, you just never found it. Don’t give them no more chances. Ooh, girl, they had their turn” - This right here speaks to seeking clarity and moving on it once you have it. You intuitively know when something doesn’t feel right and isn’t serving you. Whether that be your current role, manager, organization or company, you have to come to a place of acceptance that it’s very much possible that their time is up. More importantly, your time and energy may very well be better suited elsewhere. When and if you’re ready, seek out a trusted coach or advisor to help you in that process.

• “Everything for a reason, there’s things you had to learn from them. But when I get you to myself you know what’s goin’ down” - There’s hope and purpose in your current situation. What a relief! Sometimes we rush to arrive at a solution and end up missing the lesson(s). Those lessons add value to your unique testimony. Afford yourself the time to reflect, be patient and deliberate. With that you'll be better positioned for what’s next for you; not someone else. 

Make your ways and your doings good while there. It’s practice space. Shout out to Klanesha for reminiscing about the 504 with me last week. The beignets are calling us; we will answer post-COVID. Take care!

The Waiting Period: Keep the Faith

I know times have been challenging, especially the last several months.

The grief, sorrow, and pain. The worries and the struggles.

But we’ve also witnessed your courage, your resilience, and the generosity of your spirit.

I know times have been challenging, especially the last several months.

The grief, sorrow, and pain. The worries and the struggles.

But we’ve also witnessed your courage, your resilience, and the generosity of your spirit.

~ Excerpt from Kamala Harris’s Vice President-Elect Acceptance Speech

I received a text from a colleague that read ”Keep up the faith Imani!!!”. It appeared to be random, unprompted yet rather timely. I don’t know what inspired my colleague to send the text that day and in that moment. It was the perfect reminder for me to press forward.

Days later I noticed “Keep the faith” as the banner on President-Elect Joe Biden and Vice President-Elect Kamala Harris ‘s Twitter pages; obviously not a coincidence. I thought, could it be that we are rallying together in faith at such a time as this? Apparently people were and I hope people are.

Last week was very anxiety-inducing for most of the nation. People across the globe were tuned in to the latest updates. What a movement to witness and be a part of. It took an entire week for the election results to be called. Some chose to completely unplug from social media and the news, others claimed they would unplug but were drawn in at some point throughout the week (myself included) against better judgment. The wait was rather intense and quite the rollercoaster. Dare I mention, I‘m not a fan of rollercoasters so I was not a happy camper. Yet, keep the faith.

The presidential announcement came over the weekend and BOOM, you would have thought it was New Year’s Eve. People joined together in the streets, cars honked their horns in a cacophonic cadence and opinions and reactions began to flood every social media platform.

It was unlike anything I experienced before; a build up that spawned mass anticipation, met with a mass celebration. It made evident that fair conquered fear. Faith resulted in triumph. Faith healed and renewed hope.

The wait can be gruesome. Whether it be that job prospect or that promotion or maybe you have been in a position that you feel you’ve met your threshold, it isn’t easy. You’re waiting for a “sign” that now is your moment. You might also be waiting for victory to take hold on your job as a result of a conflict or dispute. Whatever it may be, know that the process will test and stretch your faith. Additionally, there are messengers along the way that deliver a message to keep you encouraged; angels unaware.

When it appears to be all said and done, I would like to remind you to “keep the faith”, it’s not just for a moment in time. It is everlasting and steadfast in every situation.

So, I’m thinking about her and about the generations of women — Black Women.

Asian, White, Latina, and Native American women throughout our nation’s history who have paved the way for this moment tonight.

Women who fought and sacrificed so much for equality, liberty, and justice for all, including the Black women, who are too often overlooked, but so often prove that they are the backbone of our democracy.

Excerpt from Vice President-Elect Kamala Harris’s Acceptance Speech

Faith Walk: September

As the seasons change and months seemingly fly by, I will share a monthly blog on what I just walked through. This will be a part of my monthly “Faith Walk” series.

We are well into fall, my favorite season. I sadly haven’t enjoyed any warm apple cider or cinnamon donuts yet but there’s still time :-). One  benefit of being in a region where you experience the four seasons is that you can visibly take in the earth’s response to that change. One of my favorite observations is the color change on the trees. I love to see the varying hues that are representative of “fall”. The greens, reds, oranges and yellows, coalesce into a beautiful masterpiece. A natural gift that can be overlooked if those who have access to bear witness, don’t pause and take in. 

September started with a culmination of a coaching effort I was a part of through Good Shepherd Services. Good Shepherd launched a Career Coaching Initiative for  300+ staff who were laid off in May. I stumbled across the opportunity through my network on LinkedIn; I am so grateful that I did. A professor that I never had the opportunity to work with or study alongside posted the initiative on behalf of a fellow alum. In some ways, one could say this opportunity fell into my lap. For anyone who frequents LinkedIn, sifting through the pertinent information can feel like you’re navigating a maze. As someone who never quite excelled at finding my way through to the end of the maze, I am grateful I navigated this initiative alongside my clients.

My clients ranged in age, experience (personal and professional), titles and coaching agendas. Two things they all had in common were they were all Black women that when asked shared “I was drawn to you”. I was and still am very honored by the latter point.

You see, sowing into this opportunity to conduct pro-bono coaching for a workforce that was either directly or indirectly impacted by layoffs, was very much an altruistic one. I chose to serve a cause greater than myself and my immediate needs. Even when scheduling conflicts due to family issues, health or work threw a last minute wrench in our plans, both my clients and I rose to the occasion to commit to the journey. 

The women I worked with came to our coaching journey with varying issues and questions in mind:

• I want to grow in my confidence. How can I get more comfortable speaking up for myself?

• What do I do now that I have to manage a team and my manager of 20+ years is no longer here to support me?

• My family and I are considering a relocation. What should I do when I love what I do? What does this mean for my career?

• I’m ready for a change in position: leadership and issue area. How do I position myself for that?

• I am finishing up my degree this fall. How can I move up in the organization?

I am humbled yet proud of their individual and collective work towards better. At times it felt like the impossible or as one of my clients parenthetically told me, “buckle up Imani because this is going to be a ride!”. Through it all, they ended their engagements with me more positioned to self-advocate, be agile in an uncertain time, put systems in place to commit to a growth plan, own their voices and secure greater opportunities. As their coach, I have also been changed for the better. They helped me grow in my persistence, my leadership, agility and comfortability with change, my aptitude for service and finding the joy of the little things.

One of my podcast guests, Indrani Goradia spoke of planting seeds for a tree that you may not sit under. I am grateful that I planted seeds into the GSS initiative, the lives of my clients and that they reciprocally sowed into me. We may not witness the array of hues of its growth, yet every good tree will bear good fruit.

Faith Factoid: Matthew 7:17-20

This Is Not Up For Debate

As most of the nation looks in anticipation for tonight’s Vice President exchange between Kamala Harris and Michael Pence, I write to tell you that this blog post is not up for debate. It is uncontested. Black women matter. Indeed, I am a coach and might I add the obvious, I am a Black woman. As such, the personal is political.

Black women matter in every corner of this earth. Black women matter on the frontlines and as they work from home. Black women matter as they are raising children and parenting those they birthed and didn’t birth. Black women matter as you’re designing your organizational strategy and coordinating your board meetings (we are more than coffee makers and calendar assistants). Black women matter with or without a presidential election. Black women matter every single day. We have indeed birthed this nation.

With much gratitude to a foremother of mine, Denise Materre, VP of Alumnae Relations at Smith College, my reflections on our excellence were featured in the latest Smith Alumnae Quarterly. While the focus of the article speaks to the inequities in the suffrage movement and expands upon my callout of the role of white women in repurposing their privilege, the part that I want to further drive home is this is not a drill. I say this as a former stepper (yes, I was on the step team in high school) that this routine has the whip appeal but it’s not for sport.

As my sister in disruption, Sheena Collier says through her work in Boston, this is a fierce urgency of now. I am a gifted visionary and advisor; I project into the future. I push clients beyond to see beyond their current circumstances. The fire in my writing and conviction in my pen make this look easy. I just want you to know, it’s truly the God In Me that you see. That is not up for debate.

Tea Break: I am tired! Yet, as I was reminded this morning in prayer, I can’t grow sluggish in my faith (Hebrews 6:13-14).

These past few weeks I have been stretched. The birthing of this academy has forced me to: 

• Be still

• Be patient

• Create with the Creator

• Lean into those uncomfortable spaces

• Pause on communication (direct or indirect) that isn’t serving the building process

• Be relentless

• Labor with love

Thank you Denise for imparting , “we need your voice” in our introductory conversation two years ago. Thank you to all of the women that I have grown to know through my platforms; a special shout-out to Brandy Grant whose timely podcast episode speaks to the inequities behind the veil of progressivism and dare I say, leadership development. Thank you to my clients, past, present and future for entrusting me to authentically guide you as I am being led myself. I matter, we matter, this work matters, faith matters. 

What matters to you?

What do you need to give voice to today?

Who needs to hear it?

What Is “Results-Driven” Faith?

“Results-driven” language is dripped on just about every job posting. It defines the culture of a company and communicates the expectations for its workforce. It also speaks to cultures that have been rooted and operate in White supremacy; take a moment to hold that mirror up. If you thrive in those environments, great, keep reading. If you don’t, I welcome your reflections on why.

In sharing my journey and communicating the ideal qualities for someone who takes part in this academy, I have been reflecting on what it means to be results-driven in faith. How does one measure success when they are moving by faith? I am sure a number of you have even questioned the “value” of moving by faith in the world of work. I will admit that it is a rather interesting, yet puzzling, reflection point. I have been in that very seat of questioning. I live and move by faith because I AM Faith.

This past Saturday I shared that this academy is for those:

• Who are ready & willing 

• Who will commit to the journey beyond the 7 weeks 

• Who see value in investing in their growth and development 

• Who prefer quality over quantity 

• Who are seeking truth, accountability and transformation

This is not intended to be the average coaching experience. Faith is at the academy’s foundation intentionally. It is what I know to be true and how I show up in my personal, civic and professional life. Does this mean that faith produces the results you always desire? Absolutely not! In the words of one of my friends, “This ain’t that!” Faith produces perseverance and endurance, even if the results are not what we desired. Sometimes what you desire truly falls short of what is best for you. How far have you gotten by moving by your own will ? How is that working for you?

We have been conditioned to operate and engage with others by transaction alone. This is not speaking to spaces and people that don’t deserve your energy. This speaks to the culture of “what can you do for me?”; lacking in humility, humanity, and drenched in ego.

Results-driven by faith includes:

• Seeking and trusting God over logic

• Moving through and beyond fear

• Practicing patience, prayer, and diligence in the “wait”

• Being humble yet strong in your identity

• Believing that the power & authority you have been blessed with, truly breaks ground in areas of your life

If you think the above falls short of truth, we will agree to disagree. Those who claim to achieve success by their own will are lying. It is that plain. A faith-driven approach will signal confusion for those that:

• Desire “box ready” and transactional results

• Are looking for fanfare, idols, celebrity *i.e. how many followers do you have?

• Are uncomfortable with ambiguity

In layman’s terms faith can be “defined as imagination”. Believe it until you see it….repeat. Isn’t that the undercurrent of the manifestation movement? Show me your mountain and I’ll show you my God.

Forward In Faith,

Delayed But Not Denied

Thinking back to my childhood, I have done fairly well with my vision exams. That competitive spirit kicked in with the results of a 20/20 vision. YES! You know you’ve either felt it or witnessed it. Whether you wear visual aids or not, this year has rocked the vision of a multitude. It has also led people to overly anticipate a “magical” shift once the presidential election results roll in and the clock strikes midnight on January 1, 2021. If you have been swayed by either, I have a few questions for you:

• What have you been doing to perfect your vision this year?

• What will you do when those results (election, job performance, job application, etc) are imperfect?

• Who and what are you looking to as your guide?

When I resigned pre-pandemic, only God knew what lied ahead. In addition to being a newlywed and stepping into the unknown, it seems like the world was imploding around me. The external began to impact my internal processing. So you know what I did? I prayed, I practiced and I pondered. I want to share more about the results of my pondering.

I pondered:

• How am I/How are we going to survive?

• What’s next for me?

• Do I return from where I was or move forward?

The questions were on repeat for a good month. They led to bouts of anxiety and stress. Much like what a good number of you are feeling right now. The “uncertainty” can illicit FOMO (fear of missing out) so you’re scrolling on the social media feeds for the latest update or insight from the “experts”. It can also spawn complete thought paralysis and inaction. Those are all valid responses and I experienced both. During this waiting period, I received multiple rejections. Through it, I have gained a buoyancy that I didn’t know existed. I was denied opportunities that I know I was qualified for and given the standard “we thank you for expressing your interest/applying”. In the beginning there was slight bruising because of the coupling of everything at stake (personal, professional, global). I took this leap and now denial was fueling doubt. In my stillness and in prayer it clicked: this is a delay but you are not denied.

In this moment, it can be easy to lean in to the noise and lose sight of “you”. Again, this year has been testing and there are more tests ahead. So again I ask:

• What have you been doing to perfect your vision?

• What will you do when those results (election, job performance, job application, etc) are imperfect?

• Who and what are you looking to as your guide?

I know what I have been promised. No “weapon” formed shall prosper.

Forward In Faith,