Forward Academy Testimonial: Getting to the Heart of the Matter

Almost a full year to the launch of the Forward Academy here is a reflection from our launch member

By: Angelica Vazquez

Mental gymnastics is a concept I have discussed often with other women and POC. We use this phrase to describe the mental resources that are exhausted when we find ourselves trying to co-exist in spaces that were not designed for us nor welcoming of our experiences.

I have spent too many days trying to figure out if an encounter I had in the workplace was racist/sexist/classist. When allies are not clearly visible this is an isolating experience. It breeds self-doubt. Was I right in what I was feeling? Was I overreacting? Am I imagining the hostile interactions I’ve been experiencing? If I were a white man, would the situation have ended differently?

Every step I took I overanalyzed. The fear of being seen as inarticulate, unintelligent, or over-passionate was ever present and crushing.  I avoided situations where I felt I would be exposed to microaggressions and by doing so limited my own growth. Everyday I came home feeling as if I had lived through a battle. After years of this, I was tired and the weight of my experiences weren’t just resting on my mind or soul, it was tangible. I could feel it in the incessant ache in my neck and shoulders. I needed a solution.

When Imani, L.K.A Coach Faith, presented the option of joining the Faith Forward Academy I readily signed up. A network dedicated to the professional experiences of women of color was welcomed. In the seven months since I’ve joined, I can say that it turned out to be exactly what I needed. Having dedicated space for reflection and validation of my experiences helped ease the burden I had been carrying. She has many gifts, but one of the most profound is her gift of vision. Not only can she see ten miles down the road, she can see paths not yet discovered. More importantly, she helped me see them too.

In our time together she worked on helping me find new perspectives and lean into my strengths. I spent so much time focusing on what I thought was “wrong” I missed all of the great work I was a part of and all of the strengths I brought to the table. The conversations around existing in white male dominant spaces, the affirmations, the centering, the sisterhood, the knowledge that I may be one person but I am not alone- all lit a fire of fearlessness in me. I walk in every space without fear or the need to ask permission to exist. I am guided by my sisterhood and a strengthened connection to my spiritual self.

Coach Faith is a proponent of words of affirmation. I will end with the words I was able to find and that live in my soul, propelling me forward, “I am indomitable.”

Update: Today marks 1 week since Angie has transitioned into a new role, in a new industry that reflects her values, gifts and talents. The fact that she has increased her total compensation by 40% is a well-deserved bonus 🎉. In her first week of onboarding she reports “my brain hurts but my heart is happy!”